Sometimes quite frankly life sucks! That’s just a reality.

On my About Me page, I talk about how grand life is and I say, “What’s not to love? Right?” and I meant it … every word of it. Life is good and I have many, many blessings and things to be thankful for.

Here’s my reality … I have to force myself to get out of bed every day, assuming I went to bed that is because I did not sleep and I suffer from many illnesses and depression. For instance, right now it’s 4:11 am and I have yet to go to sleep. I am in a constant state of exhaustion and yet everytime I lay my head down on the pillow my eyes will open up wide and my brain just begins zooming with thoughts. My legs get all weird and I can’t hold them still. The restlessness is enough to drive anyone insane. Yet, when I’m out of bed I struggle to keep my head up and keep going. Not sleeping was bad enough as an infant, as a young child, as a young adult, but now as I’m nearing 50 not sleeping is no longer something I wish to deal with. 

For instance, right now it’s 4:11 am and I have yet to go to sleep. I am in a constant state of exhaustion and yet everytime I lay my head down on the pillow my eyes will open up wide and my brain just begins zooming with thoughts. My legs get all weird and I can’t hold them still. The restlessness is enough to drive anyone insane. Not sleeping was bad enough as an infant, as a young child, as a young adult, but now as I’m nearing 50 not sleeping is no longer something I wish to deal with. 

I’ve had more surgeries than I care to count and am now facing an angiogram. The past few years I have managed to put further surgeries at bay and simply chose to deal with the reality of whatever the issue at hand is and get on with life. I hired a health coach and started learning new ways to deal with my health issues, and there is no denying that has helped me to feel better sometimes physically but more so emotionally.

My marriage ended in a huge mess and he is the love of my life and always will be. Not going into details here, but after he left I literally fell apart. I never knew heartbreak until the day he walked out that door.

I have a child who suffers from serious depression and is suicidal and I live in fear daily that we will lose him. I’ve already lost my mom to suicide and I just can’t fathom losing a child to anything, especially suicide. Watching him suffer is heartwrenching.

Even with all the things that sometimes make me want to scream my life sucks today I am able to be thankful for all the good that I have.

Grace & Caleb

My children are my joy! I have 2 beautiful children. I am proud of them both. My baby girl is growing up so quickly and really blossoming into herself and she is not afraid to be herself. My baby boy even though he struggles with depression he has turned into such a fine young man. All grown up and living in his own apartment now. They are both intelligent and kind people and I couldn’t ask for anything better. My life simply would not be complete without them.

I am a Christian and saved by the grace of God. I am forever thankful and count my many blessings daily for all that He has done in my life. I have certainly not been perfect. I have been known to sin. I have been known to do wrong. I am human after all just like you. I have a forgiving and loving God who upon my asking will forgive my sins. I have a heavenly Father I can call upon when I’m feeling down, and I find great comfort in that.

I have a roof over my head, food on my table, clothes on my back. There was a time when I thought I was going to lose everything but by the grace of God he helped me to figure out how to survive on my own and take care of my children and myself.

I have two businesses that I own. One celebrated 6 years this past February and the other one is brand new and still in beta phases, but has a promising product and future I believe.

When I first started my first business I was literally using broken down machines and I kid you not they were duct taped together, but today I have a pretty nice setup if I do say do myself that I am quite pleased with.

And honestly, I could go on and on with all the blessings little and big. Life is not perfect. I am not perfect. But life is good and I am thankful and grateful for all of my blessings!

Do you struggle daily with depression, illness, or something else that sometimes makes you wonder? If so, remember to count your blessings each and every day. Make a list if you need to and read it every day, read it several times a day if needed to help you remember how good life is and I promise it will help. If it’s really serious you may need to talk to someone (counselor/therapist). Please don’t suffer alone in silence as I once did. Life is too short and you deserve to live a fulfilled life. God did not put you here to be down trodden all the time. Remember to smile as it will help you feel better too. Eat right, exercise, get some sleep if you are able, pray, meditate, etc. Take care of yourself the best you can and it will help lift your spirits.

I would love to hear from you. If you have a story to share or advice to offer on how you overcame or deal with daily struggles in your life please share in the comments below.